


Trust Or Something Like It

by donniedont



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Love Confessions, M/M, Nonbinary Character, Oral Sex, Self-Harm, The Stolen Century, Trans Character, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-25
Updated: 2017-06-25
Packaged: 2018-11-18 20:53:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11298633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/donniedont/pseuds/donniedont
Summary: Magnus attempts to have a relaxing afternoon taking advantage of a beautiful lake he finds on the planet the crew is trying to save.  When he is spotted, he finds himself at an impasse concerning his dynamic with the person and what kind of person he wants to be.  Magnus goes skinny dipping.  Taako gets the tenderness forced out of him.





	Trust Or Something Like It

**Author's Note:**

> I actually finished one of my TAZ WIPs... and of course it was one that is drastically different from a lot of them...
> 
> Anyway, here it is! This came from a meme prompt list that Nikki and Maz requested the same combination of Taagnus and the phrase "You're the only one I trust to do this." After three drafts, I finally got something that balanced all the elements I wanted. Also, identity disclaimer: I'm transmasc and someone who has a past with self harm. Magnus and Taako's experiences with transness and self harm are not monoliths and should not be treated as such.
> 
> **Content Warnings:** mild discussion of dysphoria, mild discussion of self harm, observation of self harm injuries and/or scars. As always, tread carefully and take breaks if you need to.

The planet they ended up on this cycle reminded Magnus of the region he was born in. It was mountainous with dense forests spread over most of its surface. It even had weather patterns similar to home, complete with the hot, sticky air of summer rolling in after a rainy spring.

This cycle was not particularly exciting for him. They could locate the Light of Creation well enough. The problem was that it ended up on a sacred mountain that a matriarchal council of elders had no interest in allowing them enter. It also didn’t help that they only cared to hear from Lucretia, Lup, and occasionally Taako. Even with Barry trying to feed them lines, Lucretia was still blanking out, Lup was trying too hard to flirt with the elders, and Taako kept finding ways to piss them off. It was beginning to seem very likely that this cycle was going to be a wash.

With this possibility looming in Magnus’s mind, it was hard for him to focus on the archery he set out on improving this time around. It also didn’t help that he already achieved his goal- which was shooting an arrow above Merle’s head while he was mid-conversation with Davenport. Now it was just waiting and seeing if today was going to be the day that the elders were going to be willing to let them go onto the mountain.

Instead of waiting back at the village they were staying at, he decided that he was going to take some time to enjoy himself. He had spotted a lake just outside of the village before it was too cold to take advantage of it. With Lucretia, Lup, and Taako out trying to negotiate and Barry, Davenport, and Merle working on things that didn’t particularly interest Magnus, he decided that he was going to spend the afternoon alone at the lake. It was one of the few things that calmed him down during the summer months when he was a kid, so it was worth a shot to see if it would help him as an adult.

He found a small dock and began removing his clothes, standing up against the edge closing his eyes before he jumped into the water. When he opened them, he was surrounded by bubbles, realizing that his hair was long enough that some of the curls swirled into his line of vision. He swam up to the surface, bringing his head above the water and pushing his hair out of his face.

He kept his fingers in his hair, tugging on a lock of it. He usually had his head shaved when it got to this point. It was an easy enough gesture that pretty much anyone in the crew was willing to do for him. But for whatever reason, his hair getting to this length didn’t bother him as much as it used to. He just wished that he had some sort of band to pull it back with.

In spite of this, he kept swimming, content to go up and down the shoreline. He tried to replicate what he did when he was younger- swim until his muscles ached. It took longer than it used to, but eventually he felt it in his shoulders. When it was too much, he swam to the edge of the dock again, propping his arms up on the edge to catch his breath. 

As he stilled he heard someone humming. He listened to it as an accompanying chorus of rustling branches joined the sound. Magnus sighed when he realized that he was going to be disturbed. When the final layer of branches opened up, he was greeted by his crewmate Taako, who grousing about a branch that nearly took his hat off of his head.

Magnus giggled, keeping his face partially submerged. “Negotiations ended already?” he asked.

Taako took his hat off his head to tug a twig out of it. “I mean, they did for me.”

“Oh no, what did you do?”

Taako huffed. “Unimportant,” he replied, walking toward the dock and leaning against the piling to remove his boots and socks. “I’m sure Lup will want the satisfaction of telling the story later, anyway.” He propped the hat up on top of the piling before quickly walking toward where Magnus was floating and rolled his pant legs up to stick his feet in the water. 

Magnus kept his face partially underwater in hopes of concealing him pressing his lips. At this point, he had a decent handle on most of his crewmates. Even Lucretia, who could barely pull her eyes away from her journals, had some form of common ground with him at this point.

But Taako was a different type of situation. He always found a way to pull himself out of a conversation before things got too emotional. Even with having his twin on board, Magnus still didn’t have much information about their lives before they went to wizarding college. Where Lup substituted backstory with constant interaction in the present, Taako built more and more walls around himself, only poking over them to make snide remarks. 

Magnus tried to talk to Lup about it. She didn’t pull away as quickly as Taako would, but she was still vague. She would say something like, “Give him time,” before rushing out of the room, calling for Barry to help her with something.

At least Taako was willing to be close to him right now. He was currently piling up his jewelry in a bag attached to his belt and dipped his hands into the water, rubbing them against his bare legs. He kicked his legs in the water, not even caring if he bonked Magnus’s shoulder in the process. 

Magnus raised his head over the water to ask, “You coming in?” 

Taako glared at him. Magnus held his breath until he added, “Not sure yet. How’s the water?”

Magnus pulled himself out of the water enough to lean his chin against the dock. “It’s really refreshing!” he exclaimed.

“Good to know,” Taako replied. He grabbed at the hem of his shorts and tugged, not quite rolling them all the way up.

Magnus propped his feet against the edge of the dock, contemplating pushing off to float on his back. In spite of his frustrations, he was quick to accept that Taako had a sizable amount of secrets. Magnus had his own, though he would rather they be referred to as omissions. He talked about his family dog, but not how his father took her away. He talked about how he wasn’t great in school, but not because he was being bullied. He said he was a man, but not about how much work he put into making his body look like it. That point always seemed to have more weight than the others, even though his body looked more like how he always wanted it to. He had the broad shoulders, flat chest, and coarse body hair, through the aid of clever clerics and experimental potions. The only marker that he wasn’t designated male at birth was between his legs, which was typically irrelevant until he was naked, like this. He doubted that anyone in the crew, specifically Taako, would care. Between his sister being unflinching when she said that the two of them were identical twins to Taako’s blatant disinterest in being referred to as a man by anyone, there really wasn’t any reason to be apprehensive to reveal this to him. But even then, there were still mysteries to Taako that he could not be certain of.

Ultimately, Magnus decided that he really wanted to float on his back, regardless of Taako’s potential reaction. So he pushed off the dock and floated away, looking up at the sky and keeping his ears under water to ensure that he couldn’t hear any gasp or sharp intake of air in response.

He floated for a few moments, feeling his body loosen up as the sun warmed his face. He closed his eyes and was ready to entirely relax until he felt something poke at his stomach. He lifted his head and saw Taako’s leg stretched out, his head tilted curiously.

Magnus panicked, trying to stay afloat when he choked, “I’m in the club!” He latched onto Taako’s leg for support, Taako shrieking as he grabbed at the dock. 

“The fuck, Magnus!” Taako yelled, the lower half his body submerged in the water. Magnus let go, trying to guide Taako back up on the dock. Taako groaned, looking down at his wet pants. “The _club_?!” he added, beginning to wring out water from his pants.

“The… I don’t know! I was born a girl. I mean, I don’t think I ever really was a girl, but… you know....”

Taako sighed, rubbing at this face for a brief moment before he dragged his hands down his face. “Oh… _that_ ,” he groused, “I mean, it’s cool. Elves don’t do gender like humans do, so we don’t see it as this big hush-hush kind of thing.”

“You don’t?” Magnus asked. He leaned forward and propped himself up on the dock again, looking up at Taako curiously.

“No,” Taako replied, “We just… do what works for us. For Lup, it’s being a girl, for me, it’s whatever. You being a man is fine, too.” He lifted his toes out of the water to flex them. “I know a lot of humans don’t feel that way, though. It sucks.”

“Yeah,” Magnus agreed, “It does.” He pressed his cheek against the cool plank of wood and said, “It’s cool, though… how you elves handle it. Not many elves lived in my area growing up, so you and Lup are kind of my guide.”

“We’re not the best for that. We haven’t really lived with elves since we were around eleven or twelve.” He looked up at the sky for a moment and snickered. “I mean, I guess that’s kind of irrelevant right now.”

Magnus didn’t reply, quietly filing the information in his mind. It was a small revelation in terms of him understanding Taako better. 

Taako lowered his head again, making eye contact with Magnus. Even with sweat collecting at his temple and the purple painted on his lips was fading in the middle, he still looked beautiful. Magnus used to tell himself that it was the inherent beauty of elves, but at this point he could resign himself to the fact that in spite of all the frustrations and mysteries surrounding Taako, he found him attractive. Magnus reached over to place his hand on Taako’s shoulder like some form of solidarity, but Taako slipped out of his potential grasp, standing up and walking awkwardly toward his boots. 

“You coming in?!” Magnus asked excitedly.

“Yeah, but don’t make it weird,” Taako grumbled, yanking his tunic over his head and tossing it to the side. He undid the belt of his pants, dropping them and his undergarments before pushing them to the side, as well.

Magnus couldn’t help but stare. He really didn’t have much of a type. Even before the mission, the only thing that he consistently had between all the people he was attracted to was the fact that they weren’t afraid to challenge him. After that, their features, the way they held themselves, how they removed their clothes, were all uniquely them and all attractive to him.

Right now, Magnus was transfixed on a few things as Taako got ready to swim. He noticed that the way that Taako pulled his hair up and how blond parts of his dark hair sprouted out like a fountain. How one of his hands seemed glued to his thigh. How when he made eye contact with Magnus, he just grumbled, “I told you, don’t make it weird,” before he ran and jumped off the dock. He was submerged for a long while before his head resurfaced. He spat water out before he gasped, “Fuck, that _does_ feel good,” swimming out more toward the center of the lake. Magnus followed him, the two of them swimming in relative silence. 

It felt more groundbreaking than it should to Magnus. They were able to be in each other’s presence without Taako feeling the need to make a snide remark or for Magnus to desperately try to have a conversation with him. It made Magnus realize how even when they had downtime during each cycle, it wasn’t really like either of them had the chance to just existence in each other’s space. 

They eventually floated back toward the dock, the two of them close enough that their legs were skimming against each other.

“This was nice,” Taako said, smiling at him.

“Yeah! We should… do this more often, yanno?” Magnus asked. He was all nerves around him again, but for different reasons than before.

Taako pressed his lips together before he grabbed the edge of the dock and pulled himself up. As he did, Magnus caught a glimpse of his thigh before he placed his hand on it again. It had rows of angry red marks across it.

Magnus swallowed down a sympathetic hiss. He scanned the rest of his limbs and it confirmed his initial reaction- for every burn mark or scar that could be dismissed as occupational hazards, there were several clusters all over that were symmetrical and precise as if they were intended to be there.

As much as he hated to slip into protector mode, he couldn’t help when he asked, “Are you keeping that clean?”

Taako flinched before he sat up, his hand still on his thigh. “It’s cool, Mango, I fell into a branch or something. Don’t worry about it.”

Magnus sighed. “You didn’t.” Taako turned his head over his shoulder, his golden eyes panicked. “It’s okay! I get it!” Magnus exclaimed, “I did it when I was younger. Now I just pick at scabs and it drives Merle nuts.”

Taako’s stare looked less fearful, though his body didn’t relax. “Not much of a step up.”

“I mean, it’s not like we’re getting much emotional support out here,” Magnus replied. He lifted his arm out of the water and tried to search for a set of scars that went along the side of his forearm. He could barely make out the faded lines, but he could easily remember the night that it happened. “I know I can’t just tell you to stop, but. I’m here for you.”

Taako raised his eyebrows, turning himself around to face Magnus. His hand slipped from his thigh, gripping the dock so he could lean toward him. “We’re moving pretty quickly today, don’t you think?”

“I mean, maybe?” Magnus asked, “But maybe not. It’s been almost fifteen cycles of this… _fifteen years_ of this. I know that’s nothing to elves, but that’s _a lot_ to humans.”

“A long time coming or whatever,” Taako mumbled. His focus was dragging away from Magnus and more toward a spot over his shoulder. Magnus impulsively pulled himself out of the water, sitting down next to Taako. 

Taako turned his head toward him, his eyes wide. “The fuck…” he started, Magnus cutting him off by giving him a hug. Taako froze up for a brief moment before he collapsed against Magnus, mumbling, “Why this?” into Magnus’s chest.

Magnus pulled back, smiling sheepishly. “Figured you might need it!” he chirped.

“Getting embraced by a large, naked man…” Taako started, “Nah, I can’t even play that off as a joke, it definitely helps.”

Magnus grinned. He backed away, giving Taako space again. 

Taako turned himself more toward Magnus. “I'm going into the shade. You can come with, if you want.”

Magnus followed, taking the towel he had remembered to grab and laid it out along the grass. Taako gladly sprawled across it, flipping onto his stomach. Magnus gulped, trying to not let how _intimate_ this whole thing was make him misread it. This day was a major development. They could genuinely be friends. There was no reason to take this as potentially romantic in any way, especially when Taako wasn't even flirting like he usually did.

So Magnus laid on his back next to Taako, making sure to keep space between the two of them. Taako pulled at the grass and began braiding it as Magnus let himself close his eyes, deciding that a post-swim nap was in order. As his body ease up joint by joint, he felt a weight against his chest. He opened his eyes and looked down to get a face full of Taako’s hair. He raised his arm and brushed it against Taako’s shoulder, unsure what to make of the gesture.

“it's too rocky out here to lay down on the ground,” Taako explained. 

“You don't need to explain yourself,” Magnus replied, hopeful that he didn't hear his heart pounding.

Thankfully, Taako didn't say anything and Magnus was able to relax enough to fall asleep. When he opened his eyes he felt rested enough, Taako still against his chest with his hands outstretched, looping his fingers around each other.

He stared for a long while, admiring how spindly Taako’s fingers looked until Taako asked, “Have a good nap?”

“Yeah…” He squeezed him tighter, Taako taking a sharp breath. Magnus quickly loosened his grip, sitting upright. Taako stayed low, watching him carefully.

“I'm sorry,” Magnus said, “I'm pretty sure I'm crossing, like, a billion lines here… I didn't mean to…”

“Me being surprised is different from me being pissed off,” he explained, “If I didn't want you to do something, you'd know it.”

Magnus’s eyes widened. “Oh. Huh.” He rubbed the back of his head. “I guess that… makes sense.” He tentatively laid down again, this time his skin close enough to touch Taako’s. “So this is okay?” he asked.

Taako snorted. “Yes, that's okay.”

“And this?” Magnus asked, reaching out and brushing his hand against Taako’s cheek.

Taako shivered. “Y-yeah. Definitely,” he replied.

“And…” Magnus started as he trailed his fingers toward his chin, but Taako lunged forward, kissing Magnus. Magnus pulled away to grin, his eyes wide. “Wait, really?” he asked.

Taako rolled his eyes. “You literally stomp around with your jacket open any chance you get and you're _surprised_ when someone's attracted to you? For fuck’s sake, Mags.”

“Yeah, yeah, I'm still not _owning my truth_ or whatever you and Lup call it.”

“Well, now that you're officially in The Crew or whatever you said about all of us, you have to.”

Magnus giggled, leaning in to kiss him in spite of it. Taako opened his mouth experimentally, Magnus following along and trying his best to imitate him. Taako then nibbled on his lip. Magnus let out a squawk when he felt an intense pain. “Teeth!” he exclaimed, “Oh, shit, you have _teeth_.”

Taako pulled away, running his tongue along his teeth. “Sorry about that,” he murmured. When Magnus looked into his mouth he saw that they were very crooked and very sharp. 

Magnus placed his hands along Taako’s face and pulled him in again, kissing him with less frantic energy. Taako tossed on of his legs over Magnus. Magnus opened his eyes while they kissed long enough to appreciate how small Taako’s body seemed against his own large one. More importantly, he appreciated watching how once Taako was secure on him, he didn't mind running his hands all over Magnus’s body without hesitation. 

It was a sensation Magnus lacked in many of his more intimate moments prior to this. He couldn't entirely blame his prior partners. He would always be able to put on the bravado at a tavern, but the second someone went to his room it was him making sure they were in total darkness and even then, he would typically get too anxious to remove his pants. But this was different. Taako knew and it wasn't a matter of him not caring or being willing to compromise, but him being genuinely into him. 

Taako pulled his lips away from Magnus’s, choosing to trail his kisses down his neck. He veered toward the left side of his neck, Magnus letting out a deep moan in response.

Taako pulled away to grin before he ran his tongue down Magnus’s neck and resumed kissing him. Magnus squirmed, taking his hands off of Taako before he grabbed at the blades of grass surrounding the towel. Taako eventually moved toward the base of Magnus’s neck, sucking at the skin there before he moved toward his collarbone. He paused for a moment, glancing up at Magnus with his catlike eyes. “Your chest?” he asked.

Magnus titled his head, trying to process what he meant for a brief moment before he nodded his head. “Oh, yeah! Uh, don’t suck on it!” he managed to choke out. He loosened his grip on the grass, bringing his hands to Taako’s shoulders, spreading out his fingers to grab as much of him as possible. Taako nodded, lazily tilting his head back before he resumed kissing his neck, gently pressing the pad of his thumb against Magnus’s nipple. Magnus hummed in response, trying to make sense of whether or not he liked it. Taako tweaked it, failing to resist a laugh when Magnus gasped and brought his face toward Taako’s, kissing him several times around his mouth until he finally landed on his lips.

Taako kissed him languidly, changing the tone and letting Magnus slow down. Magnus complied, realizing that there was no need to rush. They certainly didn’t want to be caught by someone, especially when he really had no idea how he’d explain it- it wasn’t like they were dating prior to this. But even if they were caught, it wasn’t a dire situation. 

Taako broke their kiss, bringing his hand against Magnus’s hair. He carded through it for a moment before he asked in a low voice, “Can I suck you off?”

Magnus’s eyes widened, parting his lips to say yes before he truly thought about it. He quickly closed his mouth, taking a deep breath before he said, “Yeah. If you… wanna?”

Taako gave him a crooked grin before kissing Magnus’s jaw and began making an agonizingly long trail of kisses down. He kissed the right side of Magnus’s neck, tilting his head far enough that he could see Magnus was engaged, but nowhere near as turned on as he was before. Taako smirked, making his way over toward the left side of his neck, snickering softly when Magnus reacted with much more enthusiasm. 

“You know my weakness,” Magnus whined.

Taako snorted, nipping at his neck and pulling away as Magnus let out a yelp. He moved away from kissing his neck, racing past his chest and peppered kisses along his stomach, leaving longer kisses against his hips. He paused to grab at Magnus’s waist, lifting his legs. Magnus watched, remembering that in spite of Taako’s blatant disinterest in strength training, he still had enough of it to move Magnus around if he needed to. 

Taako opened his mouth and pressed it against Magnus’s thighs, leaving wet kisses from his knees down, pausing at the top of his leg. “And you’re sure?” Taako asked, his eyes flicking up toward Magnus’s face.

Magnus took a shaky breath, his body tingling in anticipation for the next step. “Y-yeah,” he said, his voice strained, “You’re the only one I trust to do this.”

Taako stared at him briefly, causing Magnus to hold his breath. He begged internally for Taako to not take the time to unpack what the hell he meant by that. Instead, Taako grinned before lowering his head and dragging his tongue along the folds between Magnus’s legs. Magnus tilted his head back and groaned, nearly jumping when Taako brought his mouth to Magnus’s body again, bringing his lips around Magnus’s cock.

Magnus rolled his hips into Taako’s mouth, wishing that he had more to offer. Taako didn’t complain, continuing to make slurping noises as he licked and sucked Magnus. One of his hands was placed firmly on Magnus’s stomach, his other at the base of his thigh. Between the cool shade of the summer day to the pleasure coursing through Magus’s body for what felt like the first time, he was entirely turned on.

Taako continued to lap at him, his motions becoming quicker and with more pressure behind them, a sensation that made something build in the lower part of Magnus’s body. His body impulsively curled up from his toes to his core. He opened his mouth to get Taako’s attention, the only thing coming out of his mouth being a reedy moan that didn’t remotely sound like him.

It was enough to rattle Magnus. It was high and wanton like something he heard walking down the hall of an inn, not like the gruff voice he had developed over the years. He grabbed a corner of the towel to cover his mouth, Taako pulling away from Magnus’s cock to say, “Keep going, it’s hot,” before he resumed.

Magnus pulled the towel away from his mouth, trying to get back into the rhythm that Taako set up between his head bobbing and Magnus’s hips rolling. He continued again, the pressure building up, his body curling in response, and the only sound coming from his mouth being short, lilted moans. Taako tightened his grip in reaction, his fingernails digging into Magnus’s stomach and thighs. In spite of all the buildup, Magnus’s orgasm took him by surprise as he clenched his body tightly, Taako continuing to suck him off through it. Magnus flopped on the ground, trying to catch his breath. When he felt to overstimulated to handle Taako on him, he gently placed his hand on the top of his head, Taako reading it well enough to sit up and place his hands somewhere away from Magnus. Magnus impulsively grabbed him and brought his face toward his own, giving Taako a soft kiss. Taako pulled away, his nose scrunched up. “I just went down on you, dude,” he noted.

Magnus shrugged, kissing him again before he added, “It’s cool. I don’t mind.” He brushed his thumb under Taako’s eye and wiped away the smudged mascara. “Like, I actually got off. That’s a big deal for me.”

Taako tilted his head, his persona shattered. “Wait, seriously?” he asked

“I don’t exactly feel comfortable with most people doing that to me. But it was really nice with you. So it all works out.”

Taako nodded, laying down next to Magnus. He kept his space away from him again, willing to lay down in the grass to do so. Magnus reached out and Taako raised his hand. “Let me cool down,” he ordered. He folded his hands and leaned his chin again them, staring out toward the forest.

Magnus watched him, finding himself worried that Taako didn’t enjoy it as much as he did. “Uh, this doesn’t have to be a thing… it can be a one and done… you know…”

Taako furrowed his eyebrows, still facing forward. “I mean… I don’t want it to be, if you don’t want it to be.”

Magnus grinned, facing his head toward Taako’s profile. “Good. I want to be able to return the favor. If you want it.”

Taako brought his head back and he gasped, “Oh, _please_ , I’d love that.” He turned toward Magnus and said, “Not now, though. If we miss out on dinner, they’ll never leave us alone.”

Magnus nodded, closing his eyes. He felt his heart swell as he realized how comfortable he felt in this moment. “Can I have one more nap before we head out?”

Taako sighed, fitting himself around Magnus. He tossed his arms across Magnus’s chest and lifted his leg across his waist. “Yeah,” he replied, “That sounds great.”


End file.
